Salt-N-Pepa, an amazing music group of the ‘90s and fearless leaders of women everywhere, said it best: Let’s talk about sex. I don’t necessarily mean you and I should talk about sex (although that is what we’re about to do). I mean you and your potential life partners should talk about sexual compatibility. It’s arguably one of the most important parts of a relationship. Of course, the most important aspect of a relationship is communication. Here’s a little math equation for you: Communication + Intimacy = Talking about sex.
Why Is It So Important To Discuss Sexual Compatibility?
1. Learn What He Likes
You might be surprised by some of the things your partner is into. Perhaps it’s something you like yourself but were too shy to bring up. Or maybe it’s something you’ve always wanted to try but didn’t think he would be open to. Once you learn what he likes, you can focus part of your time making sure your man is satisfied. After all, you get what you give. On that note, you can also use sexual communication to follow the next tip.
2. Learn What You Like
You deserve to be more than satisfied in your sex life. If any woman takes away a single piece of advice from my writings then I hope it’s this one: You should never have to fake an orgasm. Don’t let anyone ever convince you otherwise. And communicating your sexual preferences to your partner can help you accomplish this. If you’re with someone that you are sexually compatible with, you will always be satisfied.
3. Expand Your Horizons
When you talk about sex with your partner, you might learn a little something. Perhaps you’ll discover a kink or position you never would have guessed that you’d like. Be bold and don’t be afraid to try new things and ask for what you want. If you try something new and realize you don’t like it, that’s one thing you can both cross off your lists for next time. Becoming bored is part of what causes people to stray from their partners.
4. Avoid Complacency
A cheating boyfriend or a cheating husband will often state unhappiness in their sex life as a reason for their infidelity. There are ways to catch a cheater. Of course, this can all be avoided with a little communication. Talk about sex and be honest with your partner to avoid feeling this way or going through such a horrible experience in the future. Of course, this responsibility is on the both of you. If you or your partner is unhappy, you need to be able to express that to each other in order to remedy the problem.
If you have this discussion and find that you aren’t sexually compatible with your partner, it’s better to know now. Of course, some couples are able to work on this issue and make compromises in their sex lives to make it work for both of them. I can assure you, though, that two people who are sexually incompatible will not last forever. At least, not monogamously. And if a healthy, monogamous relationship is what you’re after, you need to have this conversation and you need to have it early on.
Allow yourself to be happy in your relationship and your sex life. You deserve only the best!
xx Amelia, Relationship Expert
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